Parish Council become White Ribbon Supporters

Warning: The article below makes reference to violent crime.

The Parish Council has pledged its support for the White Ribbon Campaign to prevent male violence against women and girls. On 25th November, International White Ribbon Day, I joined Parish Community Chair James Lancaster in attending the White Ribbon Vigil at the MK Rose.

It was a powerful evening, as we stood side-by-side with other supporters to listen to influential speakers from across Milton Keynes whose organisations are joining in the struggle to “Change the Story”.

The White Ribbon campaign to end male violence against women and girls (VAWG) has soared in visibility across MK over the past two years. I think that may be because of the appalling, global scale of the problem.

First, an awful truth: we all know women who have been assaulted by a male partner or family member. Even if we don’t realise, we do. By my early 20s, I knew around a dozen victims, and that was just the women who had told me. How many more have I been unaware of?

Let’s look at some statistics. In March 2022, it was reported that 798,000 women and girls in England and Wales aged 16 or over had been the victims of sexual assault over the previous year. Nearly half of those assaults were committed by the victim’s partner.¹

15% have experienced acts of “online violence”, with 43% of all people believing misogyny is a common motive.² Across the UK and EU, 1 in 10 have received harassment via text, email or social media.³

Let’s go even further. A United Nations report estimated that 736 million women and girls aged 15 or over have been the victims of physical and/or sexual violence at least once in their lives.⁴ That’s one-third of all women on the planet. Just let that sink in.

Living in the UK, we’ve all heard the “advice” to women and girls about changing their behaviour, clothes, where they walk, how much they drink etc. This advice amounts to little more than control and judgement over women and girls while doing nothing to address the fact that there are men who still choose to harass, intimidate, stalk and attack them, doing so regardless of women’s clothing, actions or sobriety.

Back in 2021, MK Cllr Emily Darlington led the charge for Milton Keynes Council to gain White Ribbon Accreditation for its commitment to address these issues, making the point that “we have focused on changing women’s behaviours for the last 100 years and the situation has just gotten worse.”

“For as long as I can remember,” said Cllr Darlington in a speech to MK Council, “the focus on solving this has fallen on women…but it is every man who is part of the solution.”

I cannot repeat this strongly enough: the problem here is not with the women. It is with the men who commit, condone or fail to condemn VAWG. I myself am trying to raise my young son to become a responsible, respectful grown man. It is my duty to instil in him the rights and wrongs of how to treat women and girls so that it becomes instinctive, and to know that he can speak out against these acts.

In June this year, the Parish Council voted to become a White Ribbon Supporter Organisation. I and two other male staff have been named as the Parish Council’s White Ribbon ambassadors, to lead by example in this cause. Join us in making the White Ribbon promise never to use, excuse or remain silent about men’s violence against women. Then, for our mothers, daughters, sisters, friends, girlfriends and wives, keep that promise.

I and the Parish Council are grateful to Voices of Women MK, Bletchley and Fenny Stratford Town Council, Milton Keynes City Council and all their partners who were involved in who organising this year’s vigil. I hope everyone reading this will join us in working to end violence against women and girls in Milton Keynes, in the UK and everywhere on Earth.

Visit www.whiteribbon.org.uk/promise to make the promise and to find out more.

David Griffin, Communication & Administration Officer, November 2023

¹ Office for National Statistics (ONS), released 23 March 2023, ONS website, article: Sexual offences victim characteristics, England and Wales: year ending March 2022

² https://ounews.co/around-ou/university-news/ou-research-reveals-shocking-level-of-online-violence-experienced-by-women-and-girls-across-the-uk/

³ Violence against women: an EU-wide survey, published March 2014

⁴ Violence Against Women Prevalence Estimates, 2018